Sweet defeat

If only I could have you next to me right now. And tomorrow. And the day after. I catch myself fantasising about you. About what you would say, how you would laugh, how you would grab my hand and pull me close for a playful kiss. I memorised your eyes, down to the little brownish pattern around your pupils. How I enjoy getting lost in that pattern. Lost and yet feeling at home at the same time. You didn’t do anything to make me feel this way. It’s just you being you. The little things: the way you look at me, the tone of your voice when you talk to me. The smell of your skin on my skin after I meet you. I want more of you. I am physically craving all of you. I don’t want to but the molecules of my body are chasing you against my rationale thinking. You give me 10 minutes, I want 100 more. My desire for you seems to be endless. I’m scared about this state of mind, I prefer to be in control. What have you done to me? I just simply can’t stay cool. I wish you were nearer when you’re next to me, even when you’re hugging me it’s still not close enough. The short amount of time I spend with you makes me recharge to 100% but I want 110%.

I’ve become your addict. The smallest touch of your fingertips electrifies my entire body and my breathing becomes extremely rapid. When your lips caress mine the entire world stops and the universe of you & I emerges. My brain goes blank. My skin shivers. My bones ache from the tension. I stop caring about other people around us, about what they think when they look at us. There is nothing there but our intense moment. I can’t believe I have been fighting against this for so long. But now I lost this battle and this defeat tastes heavenly sweet.